a sunny afternoon in Quebec versus a late drizzle night in Vancouver.

Quebec Monday 10/09 - 15h28

And there I am, at the intersection waiting for a green Saturn and a driver called Pierre. I'm early so I grab my little Hopper painted'cahier' that by now is already falling to pieces, and start writing.
Fellow co sharing passengers get dropped off or sit in the lawn in front of the Petro- Canada awaiting their ride.
The magic word to start speaking to one another appears to be a hesitating; 'AlloStop?'.
While that code helps some to start a conversation, others, like me, just enjoy the alone-time in the sunshine.
Reminiscing about the previous days. My hospitality hosts took me along to another family dinner yesterday evening. Dominique and her sister would meet 'la blonde' of her father
(educational intermezzo; girlfriend in quebecois is 'la blonde' -nice and derogative- the boyfriend is called 'the chum')
As a matter of fact, I learned a lot of other trivial stuff in Quebec.

Like that when playing Jungle Speed with the Family, older men will forever be bad sports when it comes down to losing -hilarious-
I also learned about poutine. (For heart-attack lovers:these are fries served under gravy and cheese curds) and that the price of poutine in Quebec can fluctuate depending on how cold it becomes.
I explain:
In winter it can become -30degrees. - which apparantly is not 'froid'(=cold in french) anymore, but so 'froid' that they have given it the new word: 'fred'... when froid becomes fred, the price of the poutine goes down to make people come out of their homes.
So -25 degrees celcius/ -25 percent discount on the poutine....

Overall, Quebec was great, but again, not where I need to be.
Maybe it s idea of the fred or the poutine that turns me off I don t know.

Pierre pulls over. Me and two others get in. This time its different, we dont talk on the way back to Montreal. I enjoy the silence more then the small talk.
Sometimes you just do.
I look at the signs of the towns along the way back:
Saint-Guillaume, Sainte-Helene, Saint-Vincent, Sainte-Hyacinthe, Saint-Valere, Saint-Simon, Sainte-Rosalie, ..
it works like counting sheep...
I fall a sleep, hoping to wake up in LA.

Vancouver almost one week later.Sunday 11:45PM

And there I am, in Vancouver the cab drops me off at a random door of a complete stranger at 11:30 PM. Arnold is the name of the Mexican man that lets me in and shows me where I can stay that night.
I sit down on the bed. Alone again. This time I feel different.
Sentiments have shifted.
The last night in Montreal before going to LA, I first handedly figured out what bedbugs are as I got bitten all all over- That, in combination with a great time with friends in LA turned me off on backpacking for the moment.
I feel too old for this shit.
Don't get me wrong, I m not complaining about my age, because until now I love every age I hit, loving life -although maybe this split second writing is a little bit of downer-.
It s just not the same anymore, blame the bedbugs, the heavy backpack, the rain, being tired...

Life on the road, in this strange room has a gloomy feel to it. And this time the alone-time is just alone, border lining with lonely.
Nobody to share the experience with, makes me almost not want the experience at all.
On top of it all: It dawns on me, I figured out...I m not at all the adventurous type, so why do I seek it? I have no clue why I do what I do.

Yes, I know, it s just the rain and the fact that I walked into a stranger's home who will kindly ask me to leave at 6 AM as he needs to go to work that makes me feel like this.
It cant always be rainbows and teddybears (this is the G rated Disney-version of what paradise looks like of course, the R rated one is safely stored in my head)

As I take the room in, a room full with paint by numbers paintings -two especially pop out: one of a cat, and one resembling a portrait of a young mr. Julio Iglesias, I know I' m bound to wake up in the middle of the night again. I m so tired though..
...
Saint-Charles, Saint Jean-Baptiste, Saint-Mathieu, Saint-Marc, Saint-Richelieu, Saint-Bruno...